Friday, November 2, 2007

The Wailing Wall

Apologies for the gap in communication.
This has been a pretty stressful couple of weeks--reorg is in the air once again in my 'other' work world. I've been waiting since summer so not a surprise, but the extent of 'laying waste' with poor planning & bumbling execution has been particularly stunning this time. Not so concerned about myself--since 2002 I've truly internalized what being an 'at will' employee means. Maybe it's my death & dying background ('be ready anytime'). But the painfilled & senseless hack and slash for others I care alot about has been unexpected & sorrowful.
As yet, I've not heard or seen the rationale for this go-round: it most definitely is not a cost savings (supposedly responsible for at least 2 previous reorg's). From where I sit at the moment, it is more likely the dark-side creep which has been evident since 2001. Momentum has been increasing & this Princess Leah is predicting 2008 as the year of the final showdown--it will either move very quickly on the current path, or a course correction will begin. I'm making no bets as to which scenario prevails.
As with any poorly thought out & lamely executed change, the dust is far from settled; I've personally seen 5-6 draft org charts--certainly more that I've not been privy to. Hard to say where it all will go, but the end result will most certainly be a direction that I have increasing difficulty supporting. So on a personal level, it is with some relief that I find myself buried deeper into the org chart than I was 15 years ago, and with a (comfortably familiar) title that I've not had for 11 years. I have some close colleagues that are so valuable to the organization that have not known from day-to-day this week if they're 'here' or not, as their name keeps disappearing & reappearing in the schematic de jour. Great way to encourage people to continue giving their all.
I'm most definitely content to be as distant from this cluster-$%*@ as possible. Mostly using what little leverage I have left to advocate for others less able to speak for themselves (as well as being the heretic I've always been known to be--speaking the truth when others dare not). It's all so needlessly energy consuming, and a little like a near death experience: keep finding myself observing the fracus from a fairly unemotional, objective distance--I'm sure because I began disengaging in 2002 a little at a time, as I have grieved over each consecutive 'grave' of lost co-workers.
So stay tuned. For the moment, I'm still on the bus--with a significant decrease in responsibilities (can we all say 'more time!') I think because so far they don't quite know what else to do with me--or I with them. It's been a lucky coincidence that I had preplanned a 4 day wkend last week and a 3-day wkend this week--you can only handle so much day-time drama (it gets toxic). You can check the voicemail when you're ready for the next wave or leave it be. For now, back to the work of this blog...that's the extent of my keening; sorry for the divergence.

2 comments:

J. said...

You and Nick have hit on two big stressors that can really ruin a good time: Roommates and work.

Julie in PA said...

Ah-In 2008 you will make up your mind. Is Princess Leah on or off the starship?